By Jasna in retrospective —

2025 fall retrospective

I'm a staff software engineer! Plus: more international adventures, not giving up on scuba diving, a few medical scares, and reflections on my career so far.

My last one was 8 months ago.

Revisiting my long-term plans

Long-term goal: pay off our mortgage before I'm 37 and Barista FIRE before I'm 40.

walletburst still says I'll reach full FIRE next year, which is incredible! And that's assuming I barely cut spending on the frivolous things I do now - international travel, occasional scuba diving, eating out or getting takeout 1-2 times a week, big home improvement projects, general shopping. We've built up a good set of investments, as well as a savings account that'll tide us over for at least 2 years if both of us lose our jobs and cut back on spending.

It's always good to remind myself of this, as well as maintain my status quo of good health and therefore minimal healthcare costs (+ maximum enjoyment of life).

What does this mean for my career?

Purely financially speaking, I could quit or lose my demanding job anytime and still be fine – for over a year, maybe more.

Developments at work have been changing a lot – generally in a positive, "upward" direction with many opportunities to learn and grow, though also with many moments of high stress. I truly hope the high stress has died down for at least the rest of the year... I don't expect to "coast", but just have some sense of steadiness.

That said, I am trying to embrace the opportunities given to me to keep learning, growing, and maturing – professionally and personally. Of course, continuing to build our financial nest egg is an amazing cherry on top, along with the great benefits my work provides – my favorites including a flexible work schedule in terms of time and location, and generally and genuinely good people to work with.

How much longer will I stick it out? My rough thought is 6 years (hitting a 10-year sabbatical) or less, until I figure out what sort of Barista FIRE job I'd like to do or just get tired of things.

Highlights

What went well:

What could've been better:

What went well

Shining at work

In October I officially became a staff engineer, and at a household-name tech company! After 12.5 years in the industry... here's a snapshot of how my career shaped out:

  1. May 2012: Graduated summa cum laude with a BA in Religion and East Asian Studies from a liberal arts university.
  2. November (?) 2012: Got my first job out of university as a legal assistant, then fired 2 months later!
  3. March 2013: Accidentally slipped into tech as a developer for a government contractor, doing PHP, a little bit of Java, and frontend work.
  4. April 2017: Became lead developer and highest ranking person in the technology department of a national nonprofit, doing Java and richer full stack work, experiencing a hellish 24-hour on-call rotation.
  5. August 2017: Fell in love with Scala as a mid-level software engineer at a small company under Cengage.
  6. February 2020: 7 years after entering tech, promoted to a senior software engineer doing Scala and product engineering at a medium-sized company under United Health Group. Grew my influence, leadership skills, and network as a racial equity ERG lead. Coronavirus pandemic started.
  7. November 2020: Became tech lead, still an ERG lead.
  8. May 2021: Became team lead, still an ERG lead.
  9. August 2021: Briefly tried startup life and data engineering at a small series C company.
  10. February 2022: Joined my current company as a senior engineer for a machine learning platform team, doing Scala.
  11. April 2025: Became team lead for a new team, doing Java, Python, some frontend and scripting.
  12. October 2025: Promoted to staff engineer, still team lead.

My timeline is slower than many peers I know and "faster" than some others, but everyone has their own story and context. I feel so lucky and privileged to be where I am now. I worked incredibly hard, and I still do today.

Advanced OWD certification

Partly out of stubbornness, partly out of my own enjoyment, I've continued investing in my newest hobby of scuba diving.

In a previous 2024 retrospective, where I talked about visiting and working remotely in Japan, I forgot to mention that I also visited (and worked remotely in) Bohol, Philippines for a week, where I spontaneously got my first (Open Water Diver) certification in diving.

About a month later, when I tagged along with my partner for a work trip in San Diego, I tried to get my Advanced OWD. I had no idea what I signed up for – San Diego water was dark and cold at ~50 degrees Fahrenheit, and I needed to wear a lot of more thermal protection. In addition to the skills I had to learn, I had a rewarding though challenging time with my instructor. Unfortunately, on my 4th out of 5 dives, I suffered a panic attack – potentially exacerbated by narcosis, and definitely as well with not being able to control my mask flooding – at ~80 feet below the surface. I thought I was going to die; my life flashed before my eyes. Thankfully, my instructor calmed me enough so that we could ascend safely and end the dive. The next dive (which was totally up to me) was peaceful, so I could end on a positive note. But for a long time after that situation, I was a bit traumatized and considered giving up on diving.

A few months later, early 2025, I was exploring options to use my annual allowance of (40) volunteer hours. I found a non-profit in Belize that did week-long scuba diving trips to hunt invasive lionfish, as well as offer various PADI certifications. On top of being able to use my volunteer hours, I could have my company cover half the cost of my trip as it would be counted as a donation with a company match. Win-win! I signed up, seeing this as a fun opportunity and way to re-try diving but in warm waters again (like the Philippines, as opposed to a place like San Diego). To reboost my confidence, I did a ReActivate course in DC a couple of weeks before my trip.

Then, diving in Belize was soooo much easier and more pleasant than San Diego. Diving to past 100 feet in clear blue and warm water felt like nothing. I was easily able to finish my AOWD, as well as earn an Invasive Lionfish Tracker certification. It was also fun making new friends. The biggest downside was dealing with cockroaches – in the shared bathrooms, and in my luggage and on my body when sleeping. 😭 I barely got any sleep, so while it looked like I was in paradise, I was perpetually exhausted.

Nonetheless, I gained so much more confidence as a diver after that trip. After that, I looked for ways where I could incorporate diving in Hokkaido, where I wanted to go for remote work this year. I found a dive shop willing to support me, despite me not being fluent yet in Japanese. It was a fun time! The dives themselves were alright, but I mostly enjoyed the cultural experience and new environment, as well as the personal connections I made. In particular, the 2nd day's dives took me to a freshwater lake, which had super clear water – and where I learned just how tricky it was to control buoyancy in freshwater! I didn't get very good at it 😆 but had great fun with my instructor, especially since it was a private experience (the 1st day was with a group). The private experience felt quite special, and whether it was genuine or not from him, I felt more connected to my instructor being able to speak and listen more comfortably in my imperfect Japanese with him.

This December, my partner's work trip takes him to Florida. So, I've already inquired about diving with a dive shop in Crystal River. I'm excited!

Japanese progress

It's been a little over 3 years since I started relearning Japanese. I've greatly ebbed and flowed in my diligence, but I still try to do a bit of input – whether with podcasts, video games, music translation, manga, weekly conversations with my language coach, or more – every day.

This September, I stayed in Sapporo, Hokkaido for 2 weeks. In addition to the diving folks, I got to practice a lot of Japanese with restaurant staff, tour guides, and the staff at a photo studio where I had my photos taken. It's remarkable how naturally I can have conversations with people when I am a solo traveler! During these times, along with just daily interactions – going to the grocery, buying souvenirs, visiting shrines, texting friends or writing emails, reading restaurant menus or signs, etc. – I noticed how much more confident I've become in speaking, listening to, and reading and writing in Japanese. No longer after each day was I just exhausted with translating; it felt more effortless, less energy-consuming. I'm definitely still not advanced, but I'm so proud of this progress I've made.

International friends and adventures

I mentioned above the international adventures and connections I made in Belize and Japan. ⭐

In addition to these, I traveled to Greece for a vacation with my partner, as well as solo to Canada and the Netherlands while doing remote work to see a few other friends.

Greece in April was very nice! I enjoyed the fresh vegetable salads and kebabs. The people were generally friendly, and there were a few times I was able to practice Greek beyond the usual "hello" and "thank you" – to a point that some of them seemed genuinely impressed! (I spent a month prior to the trip learning some phrases and practicing my pronunciation.) I especially enjoyed the Orthodox monasteries, archaeological ruins, museums, midnight Easter celebration – a rare time when Easter was the same day for both Orthodox and Roman Catholics. We stayed on the main land, driving from Athens to Delphi, Meteora, Arachova, and back over ~10 days.

I flew to Toronto, Canada, for a few days in the summer to visit a good work friend. It was lovely to meet her husband and dog, get a glimpse into her everyday life, try sailing (for a second time) with her, visit a cool Muslim museum, eat pretty good (!) Ethiopian food and quite good Vietnamese food, and meet up together with my sponsor/mentor from work.

The Netherlands was cool as well. I went just after my promotion to staff engineer was announced, so as a reward to myself I upgraded my red-eye flight to First Class. 💠 Was it worth ~$1,400? For the food, definitely not. For the service, comfort, and space, to some degree perhaps. The real test was whether I could enjoy my first day in Amsterdam after landing at 7:30 a.m. – in terms of energy, the answer was yes. I like to hope First Class helped!

My plan was to stay from Saturday to the following Sunday – 8 fully days – but I cut it a day short because my friends were less available than I expected, and I was itching to have good spicy food and be with my partner.

Still, I cherished the long afternoon I spent with both my 2 friends there, as well as the extra afternoon I spent with one of them a couple days later. That afternoon she showed me around TU Delft, where she is studying civil engineering. It's truly an impressive campus.

Bathroom remodel

In February we remodeled our master/owner bathroom. I long despised how dank it was getting and how painful the shower wall and floor tiles + glass door were to clean. The new bathroom setup has been great!

This late October, we're doing another remodel – this time to the guest bathroom, though technically I would use it daily in the morning and evening so I wouldn't "compete" with my partner when brushing teeth, etc. in the owner bathroom.

This next round is not going as smoothly as the first. I ordered a new bathtub, but it's coming a week later than expected. Demolition went so much faster than I expected. So we've been idling for a bit until the tub comes – I hope truly by tomorrow.

Maintaining weight (mostly)

At least a year and a half ago, I was at my heaviest weight in my life – about 165lb or 74.5kg. I was feeling really low and worried about myself, to the point where I visited a bariatric doctor. He tried to prescribe a GLP-1 to me, which according to his system my health insurance would be able to cover. However, after a series of trials with my health insurance, that never worked out. Plus, I read a lot of horror stories of the side effects of GLP-1s, scaring me away from them for good (mostly). However, I was intrigued by how they worked – basically they somehow suppress your appetite so you just don't have as much craving to eat, and for some people you even lose the joy in eating.

I love being a foodie, but I thought to myself that I could still enjoy food while trying to just eat fewer portions of it, as well as gravitate towards lighter options.

Later that year, with some discipline (intentionally eating less heavy things, eating lighter things, keeping up fitness, generally sleeping better with some bad streaks) and some negligence (just forgetting to eat because I was working too much), my weight dropped 13 pounds, a little lower than it was before I had gained "a lot" more weight.

This year, though I've fluctuated up to ~3-4 pounds, I've managed to maintain my weight! If I could lose another 5 pounds and keep it off, I would be pleased.

Slower in Japanese progress than possible

I've become a bit lazy with Japanese practice! Yeah I have made great progress, but it could be better! Let's resolve to do that... Do more translations, shadowing, etc.

A few health scares

I donated my 26th unit of blood last weekend! I felt unusually good afterward – normally I feel kinda weak. Unfortunately I must've been quite overconfident... My partner (who also donated) and I were walking up a hill about half a mile away from the donation center, when I gradually got weaker and weaker to the point where I could no longer stand or sit. My vision was blurring and I was starting to lose consciousness. Thankfully a phlebotomist from the center saw us and helped me regain energy by buying a cold lemonade, cold water, and salty fries.

Several days later, we went out to a restaurant with my friend. There was a point where I had inhaled some food and began violently coughing. After partly recovering, I was wheezing when breathing, but eventually that cleared. My chest was a bit sore afterward.

A week after my blood donation, I tried doing an easy run, but I just felt like my heart was working much harder than I expected. Normally I could go out for an easy run with no worries the day after I donate blood, then gradually do more normal runs throughout the week.

I just generally feel a little more fragile, less strong after this whole series of episodes. I hope I can get stronger again and be my "normal" self.

Work-life balance sometimes bad

Reflecting on this I think is especially important as a team lead. I need to better model work-life balance so my team doesn't feel pressured to follow my habits. I don't expect my team to do what I do - overwork.

I've gone through a lot of hardships at work this year when I became a Technical Lead Manager. I've been wearing several "hats" at once – Tech Lead, Eng Manager, Product Manager – and I've been overwhelmed at those responsibilities as well as various "fires" that needed to be put out. It was especially hard when I had a much smaller team that overall struggled with performing well.

Things are starting to look up, though. I'm getting more technical support from an IC partner, as well as a new hire (one of my good friends). This upcoming week a generally strong IC who was on parental leave for several months is coming back! I myself have begun maturing a bit as a team lead. I have new group-level product manager who is already providing more product support than I ever have received this year.

Annual planning is well underway, which has been a lot of work in itself. I find myself working 9+ hours regularly, and this weekend I worked an extra ~3 or so hours. I hope after this things'll die down a bit. They'll pick up again with annual reviews and calibrations this December into next January... 😄 but a small pocket of respite in between I hope will give me an opportunity to reset.

Neglecting books and modelkits

Maybe I'm just accumulating too many hobbies? No... I think it's because I reinstalled Instagram on my phone to post pictures from my trips, but then I find myself lost on it for hours watching silly videos.

I need finish posting the pics I want to post, then uninstall again! Also maybe uninstall YouTube again!

Parting thoughts

I'm always surprised after writing these retrospectives just how much has gone on in my life.

This weekend, the weekend after my recent medical scares, I've been taking it easy. I caught up on some reading, (did a little work, at a leisurely pace), washed the car, went out to eat and get groceries with my partner, and watched a movie at home with him. There's still so much housework to do... and I wish I could do more cardio exercise. But I have to give myself some grace and time to rest. Clearly I do much more than I generally remember. I could always do more, but what's the rush? Who am I trying to prove or satisfy other than myself? Most importantly, my partner is appreciating these quiet moments with me.