2025 new-year retrospective

Work is too much, traveling too much. But decluttering, gaming more with partner. Health is better and worse.

My last one was 8 months ago.

Table of Contents

Summary

Revisiting my long-term goals

Long-term goal: pay off our mortgage and Barista FIRE before I'm 40.

According to walletburst.com, Barista or even Full FIRE for me still seems to be within reach by next year. Isn't that crazy! This assumes my partner will still be working full time at least at the pay he is getting now. It is liberating to remind myself that I can quit a stressful corporate job soon and still be ok.

Whenever I do quit, it would be good to cut back on a lot of frivolous spending I do, e.g., scuba diving (quite an expensive hobby), excessive travel, excessive shopping; but in all honesty I think I wouldn't have to cut back so much that it would make me feel deprived. Looking at it another way, the life change would force me to devote more of myself to my much cheaper and as-fulfilling (or more) hobbies, such as reading, video gaming, writing, cooking, running, swimming, and taking affordable courses to learn more.

Before I quit, though, I would be much more comfortable with the mortgage paid off. Although we have been at the point where we could pay off all of it with cash, I know it's not financially wise given our very low interest rate vs. higher returns on other investments. I have been making a lot of additional principal payments to the point where we've paid off 54% of the principal in just 6 years! At this rate, by my calculations, we could pay it all off while still devoting substantial cash to other investments, and not needing to penny-pinch the rest of our lifestyle, in 4 years or less.

That said, I should still keep my career momentum going, but I don't need to put myself through so much stress and overtime. To be real, I could probably still quit now in favor of a lower stress job that pays a fraction, and still have us be financially very healthy.

The trick is to also stay healthy.

What went well

A summary immediately below, and then sections following where I want to elaborate:

  • Japanese language progress
  • Super fun volunteer program and 30 days remote working in Japan solo
  • 10th wedding anniversary!
  • overall strong year at work
  • board gaming more often with my partner
  • lost weight
  • decluttering
  • lessening plastic use

Work overall positive

2024 was overall a strong year for me at work. I led a major company-wide project, I solo-developed and launched a full-stack tool from day 0, and I solo-developed and launched some critical data collection project. I delivered several presentations. I got to showcase my strong writing skills in documentations and my presentation writing, and I think I overall have become a strong presenter in general.

2nd major solo trip to Japan

I've solo tripped several times in my life:

  • if this counts: for study abroad as a college student, 1 semester in Japan
  • completely alone to MΓ©rida (Mexico), CΓ‘diz (Spain) for a week
  • if this counts: to see friends and family in Seattle (Washington), Vancouver (BC, Canada), Orlando (Florida), Minneapolis (Minnesota), Los Angeles (California) for a few days to a week
  • and now, twice for 30 and 48 days in Asia (mostly Japan but also Philippines and South Korea)

Each time I learned a lot about myself, experienced new things, went out of my comfort zone, and made dear friends – some whom I still keep in touch with, some whom I just really enjoyed being with in the moment but have moved on from in life.

This last trip was the longest one I've been on as an adult married person. It was a bit too long for my partner and me to be apart πŸ’” but I had never made so many lasting memories with new people ever.

The volunteer program in particular was life-changing and made me appreciate just how varied (and similar) people's lives in the world are across countries. I underestimated how much knowledge and comfort I truly gained about and in Japan / Japanese culture / Japanese language, compared to foreigners who just came there for the first time. I also was reminded of how little I still knew when interacting intimately over a few weeks with Japanese locals. I was thankful for all the practice and progress I've made in Japanese language learning, but frustrated at how much further I had to go. I was amazed at the progress my new Japanese friends made in English, and I smiled at my rare insight into common interpretation problems they had in English and I had in Japanese.

The following 30 days working remotely and traveling around central and southern Japan were their own special experience. I relished the reconnections I made with old college friends and my dear Japanese professor. I perked up at the greater ease I had conversing with Japanese strangers – though I admit at times the interactions were shallow due to my limited language skills, other interactions were deeper because of those skills and the given situation.

I guess this can be said as well in my native language with strangers – it depends on the situation and the people involved, how willing people are to open up to each other.

Lost weight

Last retro I briefly lamented at gaining weight again (though was too ashamed to write much about it). I think it was the heaviest I had ever been in my life. I am not sure what caused it – perhaps it was an overconfidence in my metabolism after getting back into long distance running, coupled with indulging in "foreign" eats while traveling in London during the summer, and then some increased stress at work --sometimes I "stress eat". My shame reached a high when I sought a bariatric specialist. Thankfully (?) the prescription, Ozempic, he wrote for me wasn't covered by my insurance, so I had to give up on that route and just figure something out on my own. I learned that the prescription I couldn't afford out of pocket wasn't willing to pay out of pocket for effectively suppresses your appetite, so if I could just will myself to eat less (how obvious in retrospect), I wouldn't need the prescription. I also read some scary stuff on Reddit in terms of side effects and just a loss in joy in eating food. Now, I wanted to lose weight, but foodie life is a big part of my identity!

Through a lot of tough willpower, along with continued steady running, I did manage to get back to my normal weight πŸŽ‰ after about a month, shortly before my Japan trip. In that time, I learned that I don't need to stuff myself to feeling so full; I could just eat until I'm satiated. I also learned that I should not buy certain snacks that I just cannot control myself from eating too much of – namely, Skinny Pop popcorn! If they're not in the house, I cannot indulge.

I was afraid of regaining the weight while traveling, as I typically have in the past. Part of that is because, when I'm traveling, I am not on a predictable diet and don't always have access to healthy food. The other part is that I often felt a "FOMO" of wanting to try every single interesting new food somewhere because I'll likely never be back at that place again. But to combat that trend, I reminded myself of what I realize after every trip: the food in DC is as good or often superior. πŸ˜„ I shouldn't feel a FOMO for food that is equally good or worse.

And while there are so many wonderful eats in the world, it is really OK for me to miss most of them, even ones I may have had a chance to eat because I was in the vicinity but just didn't. It's OK. Like wonderful people I meet: I should enjoy the times we share in the moment, but be content when needing to part, and not be sad about the ones I never met or got close to. Like sightseeing: I should enjoy the places I get to see, but be content with the time I have there and the ones I can't see. And so with food, I should enjoy what I can in moderation, and be fine with food I miss or shouldn't eat more of. I no longer have the metabolism of a youth; but I can still enjoy in the world's cuisines, just in moderation.

To be fair, it probably helped as well that this was my second long trip to Japan in a "short time" (1.5 years), so I already felt like I had explored most of Japan's major cuisines without missing out. In the Philippines, well, let's say I came to the conclusion that my family's cooking is better. πŸ™‚ In my brief time in Seoul, honestly even though I was on a food tour in the same KBBQ place that Anthony Bourdain loved and then at a great bingsoo place for dessert – I thought, eh, I had equally good KBBQ in Vancouver and bingsoo in the DC area. πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ No need to stuff myself.

While traveling, I also more consciously prioritized healthier options. Last year, when I worked remotely in Japan, I was sometimes OK with eating fast food and fewer vegetables, especially at night when there were fewer options; but I felt icky. This year, I made sure to go out earlier for dinner and seek healthier meals, i.e., way less ramen (!) and more salad or vegetable-forward meals.

At home, I generally continued to reduce my portions and made sure we always have had fruit to snack on. My weight went a bit up and down again during the holidays visiting family, but I am controlling it again. It's actually lower than it's been in a few years!

Time with my partner

Over the years, my partner and I have sometimes struggled to spend dedicated time together playing board games. We make it a regular habit to eat dinner and watch a show together every night, and every weekend we try to go out for a date – always a restaurant, sometimes a show as well. We also love just being around each other in the same room but doing different things – playing different solo video games, watching different videos, reading different books, etc. But we both also like playing board games (my partner especially), and I wanted to find a way for us to do this more regularly. We tried doing a recurring Google event for every Sunday afternoon in the past, but it didn't work out well – by the time the scheduled block came around, my partner would've forgotten to prepare ahead of time. (That's normally his "role" – pick a game among our 250+ collection, learn or relearn the rules, set up the game, and reteach me what I forgot or teach me everything new.)

This time, I made sure to set a couple of reminders for the Sunday event – one a few days in advance, and one a few hours in advance. The former I think has helped a lot in having both of us mentally prepare – especially my partner who has the heavy lifting in "actually" preparing. I'm really happy that we've been more consistent in this weekly tradition.

Oh, and pretty cool that we've been married for 10 years. ❀️ It feels like so little time has past; at the same time, I can't imagine life without him.

Decluttering, reorganizing, & lessening plastic

In these past few weeks since New Year's, I've been decluttering and reorganizing like mad.

I bought "new" vintage furniture to better organize my office and our bedroom. I wanted to get used furniture as they were a bit more affordable, as well as be more sustainable to balance out a new furniture piece I currently have in the making. πŸŽ‰

I moved old furniture and organizers around to reuse them in different parts of the house. I got rid of some pretty old electronics and other knickknacks, and I downsized my wardrobe by one big trash bag full. I took advantage of my past learnings and decluttering efforts (see this 2019 retrospective on minimalism and Marie Kondo's "sparking joy"). Now my house feels sooo pleasantly organized and clutter-free.

Part of what made decluttering more focused this go-around was to get rid of more plastic. In recent years I got casually into lessening plastic due to its toxicity scares, and in recent weeks, with some extra money, I felt like we could finally afford to dive deeper into quality, plastic-free (or less plastic, or less toxic) alternatives. Some things I got rid of and maybe replaced with something else include

  • coffee maker
  • throw blankets (made of polyester)
  • some (polyester, acrylic, nylon, etc.) clothing I often used (replaced), or didn't use at all
  • kitchen utensils
  • coffee grinder (pending)
  • cutting boards (bamboo, probably glued; to real solid wood)
  • menstrual products
  • hairbrush (with metal comb; yes, my long hair can do with just a comb!)
  • food containers
  • water pitcher
  • my watch strap
  • bed linens
  • food processor

Some things I'm using up (feels too wasteful to throw away) and then replacing with cleaner alternatives include

  • laundry detergent
  • hair products
  • toothpaste (?)
  • electric toothbrush heads (maybe)

Some things on standby include

  • my prescription glasses
  • our nice rain jackets...
  • my nice beanies...
  • plenty of other nice (plastic or other toxic) clothing that wasn't cheap and I bought somewhat recently... πŸ˜”

What didn't go well

A summary immediately below, and then sections following where I want to elaborate:

  • Overworking, skipping meals
  • Sleep worsening
  • Reading much less
  • Exercising less regularly
  • Too many trips

Overworking

In Q3 and the latter end of Q4 2024, I busted my butt off at work. The results were great for my company, but took a bit of a toll on my mental health, sleep, and eating patterns. That speed is continuing into Q1 2025. I don't think it's good to sustain, but it seems difficult not to given work's demands and my own expectations I set on myself.

I have been continually finding myself sleeping poorly again. Sometimes it's because I'm literally overworking, and other times it's because I am stressed and decompressing with junky YouTube late into the night. (I wish it were with books, at least.)

I have found myself many days just literally eating one meal a day, because I'm literally working throughout the day. It's "helped" me lose weight, but it's not the right way to do it.

Exercising less regularly

Before my Japan trip, I was working out at a pace that made me proud. I ran 3-5 times a week. In the past few weeks, partly because of the snowfall and ice (!), I've only been running about 2-3 times a week, and at shorter distances overall. I am trying to do more strength training, but I haven't yet rebuilt my old habit of doing that 3-4 times a week (generally the days I would rest from running). The few times I have done strength training, I may be overdoing it (out of habit from the past) to the point where I am sore for days, and uncomfortably (rather than "comfortably" sore).

I am a little worried because I signed up again for a 10 mile race in early April. Thankfully this past week, the snow and ice are finally melting, so I was able to go on some long runs. Now I just need to stretch and do more physical therapy exercises – my body is aching more easily (getting old?!), and I worry my ankle injury from last year will flare up again.

Reading less overall

Last year I only read ~25 books, including some regular-size (in Japanese or English) and longer manga. Most of those books were in the first half of the year. I really dropped off in the second half.

Too many trips

One of last year's resolutions was to travel less overall. I think I accomplished that in the first 8 months of the year, but then it was just nuts in the last few months. I was in Asia for 48 days, then I stayed home for a week, then I was off to San Diego, New York City, and Utica back-to-back. A couple weeks later, we traveled to my parents'.

So happy to stay home these past few weeks, and it should last into end of February unless plans change. Especially with my focused decluttering, I am enjoying my house that much more.

New Year's resolutions

There are some recurring ones. Here's what I got:

  • (again) Work normal hours. I achieved this I think in the first half of 2024, I went a bit off the wall in Q3, I escaped a bit while on my volunteer program and working remotely, and then I crashed again in the latter end of Q4 into now. How do I get it back?
  • (again) Sleep more. Achieving this is probably hand-in-hand with working normal hours.
  • Finish JLPT N3 book. It may include some prerequisites of Bunpo or Satori Reader supplementary material.
  • Run and strength train 5x a week again. I kept up this habit at several points in my life, so I know it's doable. I think it's all the more important as I get older.
  • Stretch at least once a week. I don't mean the small stretches before and after workouts; but a dedicated stretch session. Ideally I should probably do a stretch session every day, but let's start small...
  • (again) Travel even less! Instead of 30+ days away from my partner and home, maybe 2 weeks max. πŸ˜… Continue to prioritize work and family trips outside of that. Travel is tiring and expensive, I am loving being at home more, and there were some tragic plane crashes recently that hit me extra hard.